Supreme leader of the kingdom of Englandshire, David Cameraman has finally bowed to public pressure and agreed to join Ukiss, the Greenp Arty, the Liberal Democrabs and the Laboureds for what's being billed as one of the biggest circle jerks the world has ever seen.
In the lead up to General Erection 2015 – The Big One, every major broadcaster – and Channel Five, intends to show all of the leaders of the main political parties along with racist hate thug Nigel Barage, bashing it out in a desperate effort to try and win the public's affections.
Cameraman had expressed his dismay at having to take matters into his own baby-oiled hands in such a public forum, but believes that now his arm has been forced he has what it takes to beat off eager puppy Edward Minihands in what is sure to be a close, but happy finish.
Today down by the river in Wivenhoe, Cameraman told watching reporters: "I mass debated with Boris at Eaton, I've mass debated up and down the docks of this country and I've mass debated pretty much every day in Parliament since I've been in power – sometimes even letting Nick Sleg get his hands dirty. If you think I'm scared of mass debating with Ed Minihands on live TV, you don't know me. I will mass debate him under the table, in a TV studio or even in a pub car park I don't care. If I have to beat off the competition one by one. I will mass debate until I'm a dried up shell of a man".