The printers in Wivenhoe Library have now been running 24 hours a day for the last week in an audacious attempt to print out Google to make it easier for residents to look up, well just about anything.
The innovative scheme, which was revealed to disinterested journalists this morning at the official launch of the new programme is part of an effort to get people back into libraries. Head librarian Angela Nebbish explains: “Back before the dawn of the internet, libraries were widely regarded as being like churches for knowledge, but with a much better selection of stories and less singing, and people would come from far and wide to borrow books and read about gangs of children drinking ginger pop and stopping gypsies from carrying out criminal acts. But then along came the internet and everything changed. We’re appealing to those that want to get away from their phones and computers and hope that by printing out all of Google, people will come to us if they want to find something out in a more analogue way.”
So far nearly 25,000 sheets of A4 paper have been printed and it’s understood that the library has got as far as the word Aardvark.
Wivenhoe mayor Dame Dannii Minogue expressed mild interest for the new scheme, stating: “Hopefully popping along to the library and flicking through this new ‘paper internet’ will be quicker and easier than doing it on your phone. If not, it’ll probably appeal to those hipster bums with beards that like old-school technology like record players, toasters and pogo sticks”.
It is hoped that the printing will be completed by mid-2018 – provided that no one adds anything to the internet between now and then.